February 2012
3 posts
1 tag
Oh, the places we've gone
ConEd Automated Telephone System: We've identified your account using the number you are calling from. We will now confirm by reading the address on file. [spells aloud correct street address, letter by letter] If this is correct, press 1.
Me: [presses "1"]
ConEd: Thanks! [pause] We do not have a telephone number on file for that account. Having a telephone number on your account can help when reporting problems with your service. If you would like to update your telephone number now, press 1.
Me: [presses "1"]
ConEd: We are unable to update your telephone number at this time. If you would like to know the date of your next scheduled meter reading...
January 2012
12 posts
Short Mike Short: On the biology of the Gremlins. →
shortmikeshort:
So, why can’t Mogwais eat after midnight without turning into Gremlins? How do they even know it’s after midnight anyway?
It’s a fact that hormones are released after eating - specifically the gut hormones glucagon-like peptide 1 and peptide YY. Mogwais must have an extremely tight 24-hour…
Good work by Mr. Short.
"Don't Cry For Me I'm Already Dead" by Rebecca... →
williebhines:
cracked:
The saddest comic you’ll ever read about quoting The Simpsons. Probably?
This is an amazing comic.
Hosting Bits
caitlintime:
What hosting bits at Harold Night/Maude Night/indie shows have you actually enjoyed? What would you like to see?
A faster horse!
2012
FIRST POST!!!!!!!111
December 2011
22 posts
Move your stuff away from GoDaddy.com →
I knew Go Daddy was sleazy, but I didn’t know they were this sleazy:
See, but now things have come to a head. It turned out that not only was Go Daddy happy to put their names supporting SOPA, which is a hell of a restricting, dangerous, and censoring law, but they’d helped to write some of it and, even more offensively, were exempted from it. In other words, they’d found a way to be as...
Paul Krugman, S.O.B.
Jonathan Chait, on Sunday:
The most remarkable attribute Krugman has brought to the Times is rudeness. The social niceties that accompany his exalted position are utterly lost on him. He does not seek out the company of famous politicians and cannot be courted with flattery or access. He understands that you can’t arrive at truth without explaining why mistaken beliefs are wrong.
Paul Krugman,...
Fancy Jobs
Abed: If he wants to impress people, why join a pottery class? Why not just say, “Hi, I’m a doctor?”
Jeff: Because he’s crazy. And fancy jobs don't impress people. I mean, you weren't impressed I’m a lawyer.
Abed: Well, anyone can be a lawyer. You can even represent yourself. You can’t do surgery on yourself, it’s illegal. You get arrested. And then you get a free lawyer.
“It looks like a human was involved in choosing what went where,” Marissa told...”
– Marissa Mayer addressing Google designers, as quoted in “In The Plex” by Steven Levy (via buzz)
2 tags
Louis C.K.: Live At The Beacon Theater (2011) is... →
As I write this there are 617 people seeding the file, and another 119 in the process of downloading. (If you don’t understand how torrenting works, read the brief beginner’s guide on LifeHacker.)
atndigcrk, the user who initially seeded it, begins the file description,
yea its the new one yea i kinda feel bad putting it here but people like louis ck gotta realize without torrents...
“Saying newspapers will provide a stable home for reporters, just as soon as we...”
– Clay Shirky, “Institutions, Confidence, and the News Crisis”
“The world is full of people fat-fingering their cheeto-stained keyboards with...”
– Jason Scott, “Dear Brian”
a common lament
halphillips:
I wish it were easier to find your way into an improv practice group when you’ve been around a long time and no longer have contemporaries who are coming up through classes and eagerly forming groups left and right.
I wanna do more improv.
We should found an improv old folks’ home.
“The fact that the party is committed to demonstrably false beliefs means that...”
– Paul Krugman, “Send In the Clueless”
You will always be a child of two worlds.
Vulcan Council President: You have surpassed the expectations of your instructors. Your final record is flawless, with one exception: I see that you have applied to Starfleet as well.
Spock: It was logical to cultivate multiple options.
Vulcan Council President: Logical, but unnecessary. You are hereby accepted to the Vulcan Science Academy. It is truly remarkable, Spock, that you have achieved so much, despite your disadvantage. All rise.
Spock: If you would clarify, Minister, to what disadvantage are you referring?
Vulcan Council President: Your human mother.
Spock: Council... Ministers, I must decline.
Vulcan Council President: No Vulcan has ever declined admission to this academy!
Spock: Then as I am half-human, your record remains untarnished.
Sarek: Spock, you have made a commitment to honor the Vulcan way.
Vulcan Council President: Why did you come before this council today? Was it to satisfy your emotional need to rebel?
Spock: The only emotion I wish to convey is gratitude. Thank you, Ministers, for your consideration... Live long and prosper.
Why Siri Can't Find Abortion Clinics & How It's... →
If This Article Is Correct, We're Closer To... →
One of the biggest problems with America exporting all of its manufacturing is that nobody here has a fucking clue how anything is made any more. They assume making things is easier than thinking them up, because we’ve supposedly offloaded that work to foreign savages while all the hard thinking work remains here. They don’t understand how difficult or complicated it is to make...
DesignAday: Museum of Obsolete Objects →
designaday:
There’s a rather amusing, and quite clever, YouTube channel titled the Museum of Obsolete Objects. Short videos demonstrate the use of objects that, as the name implies, have become obsolete. The dial telephone, instant camera, and abacus are examples. The videos are well-produced, and many of…
1 tag
“It is unquestionably true that without entrepreneurs and investors, you can’t...”
– Nick Hanauer, “Raise Taxes on Rich to Reward True Job Creators”
2 tags
The 5 Best Toys of All Time →
I defy you to come up with a better list.
My favorites were/are #2 and #4.
3 tags
Senator to US Airways: please rethink fare hikes →
In January, Southwest Airlines will stop flying between Philadelphia and Pittsburgh, leaving US Airways as the only airline with a direct route between the two cities. So what is US Airways going to do? Hike its fares.
US Airways has a long history of being a shitty company. Ever wonder why Pittsburgh has such a nice airport? Throughout the ’90s, Pittsburgh was a US Airways hub, and the airline...
November 2011
38 posts
Amazon.com: Customer Reviews: Defense Technology... →
Yelping with Cormac: Olive Garden →
yelpingwithcormac:
Walnut Creek, CA
Cormac M. | Author | Lost in the chaparral, NM
Four stars.
And so. The day came. The alguacil asked the boy what did he wish for a last meal. The boy asked for a bowl of pasta from Olive Garden. The alguacil considered this and finally agreed saying there was indeed an Olive Garden…
If you care about Benjamin R.’s opinions you will find Cormac...
2 tags
“I watched the clip and, in my opinion, he’s not impugning actresses. He’s not...”
– Jon Bershad, giving Aaron Sorkin the benefit of the doubt
2 tags
If you have experience traveling on Greyhound,... →
Occupy My Shoes →
sebsational:
And because I wasn’t feeling particularly friendly, because I thought I had already indicated that I did not want to talk about this (in fact, I feel like I gave her pretty good indications that I did not really want to talk at all; my voice hurt and I just wanted to rest it), I decided I would bite the bullet and have a discussion with the woman cutting my hair. “Yes, I know...
salgentile:
These obvious attempts to instigate clashes with the police will only discredit the movement, even though the vast majority of its supporters remain peaceful and non-violent. There were plenty of protesters at Union Square who spoke passionately and intelligently about important social and political issues, like student debt. Their voices may be drowned out by the people who throw...
halphillips:
I just looked up old New York Times articles from 1967-1970 about student protestors, to see how they were covered at the time.
What stood out the most was how similar everything was to today— even more than I expected. We all know about major incidents like Kent State or the 1968 Democratic convention, but there were all these articles about smaller, everyday protests. And so many...
#OWS
Watching on Ustream because I literally forgot this was happening today, and stayed up til 4am working on something unrelated. I feel guilty that I’m not participating.
A lot of the rationale used to arrest protestors has to do with blocking access to public spaces; i.e., on private property you’re trespassing, on public property you’re preventing other people access...